I've experienced a rougher than usual dating background but some of that goes with the rougher childhood terrain, or Im starting off by giving this way too many excuses before beginning. While it's been nearly ten years ago since I swore off dating, I've relapsed back into the same heartless, desentized dating game realization filled to the brim with Givers and Takers. A las, I gave an African American a chance without planning after some recent Dating Violence traumatised me beyond comprehension. I'm unsure if it is the black males or black females that severely dissuaded me from ever doing this again. Both appear as unbelievable drama dwellers and instinctually nosey individuals. Rumors began as an immediate attack on my sex, race, color and individuality. I'm constantly heckled and had endured over-the-top cyber bullying and online stalking since my curiosity in dating African American men. I can't say if it's directly related to dating black males or if the quality over quantity subject raises my brow in the end. Most men are either too damaged or severely broken to offer modern day females the support and gentlemen they truely desire. Romeo is dead. But, after dating black men I feel trampled, attacked both spiritually and sexually. Again, this could all be bad timing or some ironic destiny I had to face and had it happen with a Norwegian Viking the same brutal outcome may have been evident. Or then again, this is a stark naked reality white women face dating black males. Not only did the black male threaten to leave me for other black females but he cyber stalked my own white girlfriends and I'm thrown into a dilemma that I dont see more reason to give much energy. I've cried consistently over two years now by this affair. "Long distance" was another weight drafted onto my shoulders and clearly by now I've none other to blame than myself. Texting two states away was something I clearly have a backbone and strength to overcome. His may be another story. The man seemed to shoot red flag arrows straight into my heart from nearly the beginning. There could be some outlining issues or inner turmoil within them for white women.
Black men expect you to buy your own dinner and drinks, and you might as well pocket your own entire date. They have been clearly burned by blood and money thirsty females, and get hostile towards your sex or continuously compare their bank accts as if they're stuck on themselves like a attention yearning, greed-grinning stripper. It lead me to wonder if a great majority of them would vote to legalize prostituion, and not for the other sex, but for themselves.
The first several months into the black scene, I constantly felt like I was clarifying that I wasn't racist with him. People literally have no right running around these days saying they are racist, than proclaiming they aren't. I truely felt true love for another race and he's still competively hard to get over. There's some serious crazed competition out there for these individuals. If they are not competing at ass-staring contests, they're competing over jobs, meals, clothes, girls, sports or their identities. I was told to have more compassion yet not once did I really feel the black male give me any genuinely.
Something I may just be finally getting about relationships is that it's about earning respect, not regret. Perhaps, black men could be the utmost hardest people on earth to give you respect, let alone the hardest to reward it to any man or woman. I shouldn't feel so SINGLED OUT.
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